Family is what you make it

Family is what you make it The word family can mean so many things to different people. For some family is your having a husband or wife and 2 kids. For others family is the friends they surround themselves with.

I am in my eyes fortunate to have what I guess is now days called a traditional family. It is what I hoped and dreamed of. Hence why I say I am fortune. I don’t impress that opinion or parameter on others. They have their own ideas.

I have a loving husband, my two-year old son and will be adding the addition of a new baby in a few months. However I am acutely aware that this is not always the norm any more. Living in Portugal I was shocked to discover that very few Portuguese view marriage in the same way. Or at least so in the Algarve region where I am based. Indeed my own husband’s view on it when we met was there was no need to or want to ever get married.

Given we had such conflicting views on the subject. You would think we spent many hours arguing about this. But we didn’t. We both had similar views and values when it came to creating a family. Over time my husband came to see how important the element of marriage was to me in this. Given that I am calling him my husband then it’s clear we actually did do it. However we made it our day and completely different to the type of ceremony he had grown up to expect. No church service. The shortest legal ceremony possible and a massive party for our friends and family. By doing this we were able to come together on our views and compromise so both were happy. 

Blending Things Together

To me that is often one of the biggest factors in the make up of a family. You will not always see eye to eye. You will have a difference of opinion. However you’ve love for each other allows you to see past that. To gain understanding and to learn to compromise so that both sides come out of it as happy.

For us raising a family, involved two very different cultures. Conflicting views on many things. But we are in this together and we both agree sharing all sides of our cultures with our children is important

They will grow up in a calm, peaceful, beautiful place. Far removed from the craziness of the UK. They will see sunshine almost every day, swim in the sea every week and learn that there is a struggle involved in living in paradise. However they will to get to see the busy rat race, hustle and bustle of where I come from. Of the places I visited when I was a child and the life I lead before I moved it. It’s important to both my husband and I in giving them a well-rounded upbringing.

Making a family though is so much more than becoming husband and wife, or having children. It is learn to celebrate each other, our successes our failures. It about how we come to communicate with each other. How important that communication is and not letting it break down. You birth home can be a million miles away, but if you build a circle of people around you who love and care for you and a warm safe environment to return each day. That is truly your home. That is truly your family.  

What is it about family you value the most?

 

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